I thought the saying goes- "Don't name what you are going to eat". (Most) farmers who raise pigs, cows, or chickens for food wouldn't name them Daffy, Henrietta, Bessie or any other proper name for the fact that they are a food source and not a pet: a situation in which emotional attachments are difficult (not to offend any vegetarians or pet cow owners). Cheese seems to break this rule. Some will argue that cheese is a living thing (or a slowly dying thing) and therefore one must care for it from inoculation through maturation- correct? With names like Pierre Robert, Dafne, Rupert, or Moses I wonder how far these emotional attachments go with the cheese and its 'maker'.

I was told an entertaining yet serious story of one of the cheese makers of Gorwydd Caerphilly from Wales during a US visit gasping at the atrocious site of his cheese being left to rot and wither away in an over crowded, ill maintained case. He grabbed the cheese, fell to his knees and pleaded, "Oh what have they done to you, my love?!?"

With a few spare minutes in a slightly slow day, I looked through the case at the shop I work at and humored myself with names of cheeses that would be appropriate for a child. Brie, Jack, Chester or Edam seemed typical but what about Stilton, Raclette,Havarti, or Fontina? ("Stilton, go to your room!" or "Gee, do you think I can borrow a buck, Havarti?")

Why didn't cheese makers, like live stock farmers, stick with descriptors like spotted, yellow, or stinky one to ID their cheeses rather than such bold and heartfelt names? I may not get as much sleep tonight thinking about this.

Please comment below and feed this idea with either a cheese name that you would deem appropriate for a child or a name you would choose for a newborn cheese….

-Austin